Two men seated next to each other on plane. After a while the first guy says "Based upon your attire, your witty conversation, and your intelligence I presume you are a graduate of Ole Miss." The second man says, "You are correct. And I see you are a graduate of Mississippi State." The first man says, "Oh was it my interesting conversation, my humor, or something else?" The Ole Miss grad says, "I just read your class ring when you were picking your nose."

“ESPN coverage of the Semi-Great Race continues here in California’s Death Valley. I’m Cole Cubelic, your dashing color man for this phenomenal event. Three intrepid participants are preparing for the final 40-mile leg of the race which crosses this arid wasteland during the hottest part of the year. Staying well hydrated will be the key factor in determining the winner. Our three contestants are current college students all hailing from the state of Mississippi.” “Our first, Stuart, is a senior at the University of Southern Mississippi. Stew, how do you plan to deal with the deadly heat of the desert?” “Well, I plan to pull this Flexible Flier wagon loaded with 50 cases of bottled water so, if I get thirsty, I can pop the tops of as many as I need and re-hydrate (whatever that means).” “Our second contestant is Marty, an Ole Miss senior. Marty, how are you going to handle the heat during the race? I see you’re not carrying any water.” “Well Cole, I have $1500 in my wallet. If I get thirsty, I will just buy some of Stew’s water.” “The third contestant is Bully, a three-time senior from Mississippi State University. Bull, you appear to have a unique approach to this race. Tell our audience what you have here.” “I got a complete door from a 1948 Ford Business Coupe.” “And how do you think it will help you survive in Death Valley?” “Well, duh, Cole. When I start getting too hot, I’ll just roll down the window.”

A professor at the Mississippi State was giving a lecture on the supernatural. To get a feel for his audience, he asks "How many people here believe in ghosts?" About 90 students raise their hands. "Well, that's a good start. Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you've seen a ghost?" About 40 students raise their hands. "That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?" About 15 students raise their hands. "Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?" 3 students raise their hands. That's fantastic. Now let me ask you one question further...Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?" Way in the back, Bubba raises his hand. The professor takes off his glasses, and says, "Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture; no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience." The big redneck student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium. When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, "So, Bubba, tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost?" Bubba replied, "Shiiiiit! From way back thar I thought you said, "Goats!"